Navigating confidence at work when returning to the office

Words by Clare Dyckhoff

There’s a new conversation starter doing the rounds these days...“I remember the day we went into the office and were told to work from home, horrified at the thought of doing it for two weeks...and look at us now”. The same words roll around my mouth and brain far too often than I’d like to admit. Ahh the working-through-a-pandemic-situation, don’t we know it well. 

With companies previously shifting to remote-first overnight and now the discourse moving to how we start to return, with so much change constantly occurring, what does this mean for our self confidence in the workplace? What can we do to keep it topped up on days we need a little support whether at home or in the office? 

When I joined the media agency world nearly seven years ago, I quickly became accustomed to the ongoing process of growth, feedback and clear progression that stood ahead of me as a junior executive. 

Having face-to-face conversations with managers at the time on what was going well, opportunities on the accounts I worked on and having clear hurdles ahead of how to get from A to B soon became something I hinged my confidence in the workplace on.

After all, if I had been offered a chance to present in a big client meeting with senior people, I was clearly doing something right. The first time I was approached to speak at an industry conference, my imposter syndrome grabbed the mic and turned it down. My brain told me I wasn’t anywhere near as knowledgeable as the speakers I used to hear at those very events. But with a lot of encouragement from my managers at the time, I eventually did it. When I did, it gave me those bursts of adrenaline to encourage me to keep going, picking up pieces of external confidence boosts and validation wherever I could. 

Going from a place where my self confidence and worth at work relied on promotions and pay rises to being fully remote every day, was something I (and so many of us) was not expecting. I could no longer rely on the regular in-person feedback, smiley and casual conversations, 1:1s and ad-hoc uplifting comments to prove to myself and my overthinking mind that I was doing a good job.

At a time where everything slowed down and ground to a halt, I found my confidence in my abilities at work did so too. My confidence in my skills, contributions, and self-worth took a plummet. 

Fast forward 18 months and here I am, still sat at home but at a different table - living and working alone but diving into how to build self-worth myself, either when working remotely or returning to the office. 

If you too need the odd pick-me-up on days where you’re not feeling your best or when you need a bit of a self-confidence boost, the following things might be a gentle place to start. 

Keep a diary of “past wins” and positive comments 

Keeping positive comments about you from work or praise and celebrations of past projects stashed away in a diary or in a folder on your computer is a quick and easy ongoing activity you can do to future proof any wobbles in self belief.

On days where you might be taken over by overwhelm, lethargy, or mental exhaustion - taking a little look at all the things you’ve achieved in the past can be an instant positive reminder and confidence booster. Not only will you have forgotten some of the biggest things that might have shaped your career or progress as you went straight into new tasks, it’s an instant reflection on what you’ve handled in the past and what you can continue to handle now and in future.

Past you would be proud to see where present you has got to, and present you can reconnect with that past version of yourself who did do all of those things and proved you wrong on some occasion. It is a quick and easy way to curb any negative self-talk and remind you of how far you’ve come. 

If you’re not getting enough feedback, ask for some

Businesses and teams have changed beyond recognition in this weird time. There might be weeks where you’re not feeling confident that what you’re doing is enough - especially if you are working as an individual contributor or leading a team in quite an isolated environment. 

If you’re an IC, ask your manager or those closest to you on projects on how you are doing and if there is anything you can grow more confident in. I’m really lucky that I work in an open feedback environment where it is encouraged to share words of both positive and constructive feedback, from a position of care and dedication to each individual's growth.

You shouldn’t feel afraid to ask for more feedback or reassurance if you feel you are lacking in direction. Companies know employees are vulnerable and need more support at this moment, more so than ever, so communicating what you need to someone you trust is a good first step.

It’s normal to feel a little ‘rusty’ - especially if you’re entering a new job or have taken a break from work

It’s one thing to experience ongoing maintenance of self-confidence at work if you’ve been working through the pandemic, but what if you haven’t? Returning to work is a big thing to go through at the best of times, so if you are feeling a little rusty, it’s normal to feel that way. To start to build your confidence on your return to the office, take some time out to dive into relevant materials. With free online courses, reading, youtube videos, Tik Toks, and case studies online - you have a wealth of information at your fingertips, even if it’s diving into them for 20 minutes each day to build your confidence in the things that you do already know, as well as focusing on what you might need to grow in. 

Be your own biggest fan

With so much more time to reflect on the past 18 months - our purpose, views of our lives, and what really matters to us, it’s easy to focus on what we don’t know and what we are yet to do. The first step to denting self confidence is talking down to yourself. Sure, we might not know everything and we might get things wrong, but that’s part of life. It means you’re growing. Fear of failure is the first blocker to growth and confidence as it freezes you instead of invigorates and inspires you to try new things. 

If you’re learning how to be better to yourself and your own biggest fan, you will build inherent confidence that is harder to dent, whether you’re working remotely or back in an office. The biggest challenge of moving to WFH is the lack of external validation that so many of us rely on for confidence boosts. Trusting your own judgement, skills, and knowledge is the key to self-confidence. 

Reconnect with that “thing” you always did en route to the office

It could be catching up with the latest podcast on your drive to the office, reading the rest of the book you’ve been itching to finish for weeks, or just stare out the window of the train and let your thoughts gather and roam. The first time I went to the office after working from home for so long, I could feel my anxiety bubbling up on the train and my heart rate increasing dramatically from the uncertainty.

I immediately put on my headphones, opened my Calm app and did a 15 minute meditation and grounded and reconnected with myself mentally and physically before the train announced we were there. Don’t be afraid to develop new routines or revisit old ones, if they work to help build you up first thing.

Find the people in the office you can feel at ease with

As we continue to adapt to a new hybrid way of working or even full time back in the office for some companies, having friends and confidantes at work is even more essential. Find the people you trust, who make you feel good and comfortable in their presence, and gradually build up that time with them. Not only will it help make you feel connected with the rest of your team and bring more of the culture back that you might have been missing, but it will help bring out your confidence again - both in terms of connection and self-worth beyond what your deliverables are, but who you are as a person and a colleague. 

We are all different and our journey to self-belief and self-confidence won’t work to the same timeframe. That’s OK and it’s all part of the process. If you still feel you’re stuck or talking down to yourself when you need building up, at home or in the office, remember that the people you look up to also look up to others. The more we communicate and discuss this feeling, the more normal it feels (and is!)

Feel free to take things at your pace. After all - we will be readjusting for a little while yet.